Life Ain't Always Easy
by CeCe17
Summary: Carrie just wanted to have a simple and normal life. Maybe even be happy for once in her life. Unfortunately for her, life had other plans and she is going to realize that life ain't always easy, especially when SAMCRO is involved.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: To those who have read my other two stories, I just want to thank you guys and I hope you like this story as well as the other two. This is just another idea that has been in my head and I couldn't wait to share it with you guys. I'm still going to continue the other two stories as well as this one. I hope you guys read, review and like this story. Can't wait until September 11th, the new season of Sons of Anarchy IS GOING TO BE AWSOME! =). Anyway I hope you guys like the story and here is Chapter One.**

CHAPTER ONE

Life isn't always simple. There are always bumps along the way, that seem never-ending but one must overcome them in order to move on in life. Sometimes they don't affect your life but most of the time the decision you make in how to overcome those bumps in life has a huge impact.

For Carolyn Blake,or Carrie as everyone called her, life had been full of those bumps. She had to decide whether to stay with her father or move with her mother when they divorced. Then she had to deal with the fact that after choosing to live with her mother, Linda, her father, Sean, rarely visited her. It wasn't because he didn't love her, on the contrary she was his world, but it was because her mother simply wouldn't allow it. It seemed like she was keen on making Carolyn as miserable as she was. She would always put her down no matter how hard Carrie tried to make her proud, it seemed like everything she did was never enough. Linda was only focused on one thing and that was getting her next fix. She had turned to drugs and alcohol in order to numb the pain she made for losing her husband. Whenever she was high or drunk she would always take out her frustration on her daughter.

Fortunately for her, her father had gone straight to her mother and "talked" her into letting Carrie move with him. In fact it had taken him $5,000 plus the alimony he owed her, for Linda to let their daughter move in with him. Linda of course started wasting the money on getting high and drunk off her ass that she started wasting her life away and shortly after moving in with her father, Carrie had to suffer again. Only this time she was grieving over the death of her mother.

Even though Linda had treated Carrie poorly after the divorce, Carrie always had hope that one day her mother would just turn her life around and be the loving and caring mother she once had been. Unfortunately that would never happen since the same thing that Linda would use to numb her pain was what caused her untimely death and that caused Carrie a lot of pain.

She eventually got over the pain of not having her mother with her anymore and started living life as a normal teenager. However it seemed as if life didn't want her to be happy because as soon as she felt like everything was going to be okay, tragedy had to strike once again. This time it struck in the sudden death of her father. The one person who she truly felt cared about her suddenly died and she felt as if her whole world had come crashing down. She tried to get passed the pain she felt and make something of her life in order to make her father proud. She slowly started getting passed the pain she felt, but along the way she also started pushing those who cared and tried to help her get through her tough time away.

After graduating high school, she quickly went into college and started studying to major in pediatric nursing. She always knew that she wanted to do something in the medical field and she had always loved kids so her choice was really simple.

After graduating form college, she started working at the Children's hospital in Seattle, Washington. She loved her job but the reminders of everything that had happened haunted her and she couldn't deal with the daily reminders that her life had been anything but easy. So when a job opportunity appeared to work at St. Thomas Hospital in a little town called Charming in California she took it and never looked back.

So now she was on her way to her new life in a new town where she wouldn't have reminders of how much she had suffered. As Carrie was driving she didn't want to think about the past, all she wanted to do was focus on the present and future.

She had been on the road since before the sun was even out. No the sun was setting and she kept getting closer and closer to her destination. She saw the "_Welcome to Charming" _sign and couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief. She would finally be able to get some rest before heading to work tomorrow.

Luckily she had found an apartment when she had come down a month before for the tour of St. Thomas and had gotten new furniture while down here so all she really had to do was unpack her clothes she had with her.

She arrived at her new home just as the sun had finished going down. She parked her car in the parking lot in front of her apartment building. Carrie took out the suitcase and duffel bag filled with the clothes she had decided to bring while the rest she decided to give to Goodwill.

She slung the duffel bag on her shoulder and rolled the suitcases to her apartment door, luckily for her the apartment was on the left side of the building and was the first one on the first floor, so she didn't have to carry them up the stairs.

She opened her door and carried her things inside. She put them down by the door, turned around to close the door and let out a sigh of relief as she took in her new home.

She took her stuff into her room and started unpacking some of her clothes, since she had to show up to St. Thomas tomorrow for her first day of work. Once she had most of her clothes unpacked and put away she decided to finish unpacking the rest when she came home from work.

She changed into a pair of shorts and a tank top, tied her hair up into a messy bun, before laying down on her bed.

She was staring up at the ceiling and hoping that everything in her life would be better than how it had been in the past. The last thought that crossed her mind was that she just wanted to have a normal life where she could be happy for once in her life. Unfortunately for her, life ain't always easy.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you to those who have read and reviewed the story. I really appreciate the feedback. The new episode of SOA was Awesome, I can't wait to see more of what is to come in the new season. I hope you continue to read and like this story.**

CHAPTER TWO

The next morning when Carrie woke up it was six in the morning and she didn't have to be at St. Thomas until eight that morning for her shift. She got out of bed and made her way towards the closet and started to pick out the scrubs she was going to use, since she was going to be mostly working in the pediatrics section of the hospital, she decided to wear a pair of scrubs that were light blue with the Winnie the Pooh characters ,when Piglet, Tigger and Pooh were babies, on the top and plain light blue pants and a comfortable pair of shoes since she was going to be walking around a lot.

Once she had her work outfit together, she gathered everything she needed to take a shower and headed towards the bathroom, that was down the hall. Once in the bathroom she started the shower, got out of her clothes from the night before and got into the shower. She washed her hair with her favorite strawberry shampoo and washed her body with her vanilla body wash. Once she had washed her body she shaved her legs and underarms, before turning the water off and quickly wrapping a towel around her body and hair. She stepped out of the shower and dried her body before putting on her underwear and bra. She wrapped the towel around her again and made her way towards her bedroom.

Once in her bedroom she dropped the towel around her body and hair, put a white tank top on, and put her scrubs on. The she combed her hair before plugging the hair dryer and drying her hair. When her hair was dry she put it up in a pony tail and clipped her bangs back so they were in a little bump. She put on some makeup but kept it light and natural only using some foundation, eyeliner, mascara and some lip balm.

By the time Carrie was ready she only had half an hour before she had to leave to be at the hospital. She decided to leave a couple of minutes later, since she could get something to eat at the hospital and she also didn't want to be late on her first day of work.

She grabbed her keys and purse before heading out the door. She locked the door behind her and made her way towards the parking lot. She unlocked the car, put her purse in the passenger seat and got in the drivers seat.

Carrie was feeling a little nervous because she didn't know what was in store for her but put that thought in the back of her mind. She took a deep breath before starting the car and making her way towards St. Thomas.

She pulled into the parking lot 15 minutes later, parked the car before turning the ignition off and getting out. She grabbed her bag from the passenger seat, locked her car and made her way towards her new job.

Once she reached her floor, she couldn't help but smile a little knowing that she had missed not working and helping the kids get better.

She clocked in, before putting her bag in the locker assigned to her. She walked out and made her way towards the elevator to go to the cafeteria and get something to eat.

As soon as the elevator doors opened she quickly made her way towards the cafeteria. She wasn't feeling very hungry so she got some coffee and a blueberry muffin. She paid and quickly made her way towards the elevator and up towards her floor.

* * *

The day seemed normal and kind of boring. It was now noon and it was still a slow day, in a way Carrie was happy because that meant that there weren't little kids who needed serious medical attention.

The happiness Carrie was feeling suddenly melted away when Doctor Namir and Doctor Knowles told her that they needed her to assist in the delivery of a baby boy whose mother had overdosed on crank. That statement completely ruined the happy mood she was in but she quickly made her way after both doctors.

After what seemed like an eternity, Doctor Namir and Doctor Knowles delivered the baby boy, and were able to stabilize the mother. Unfortunately the baby was born addicted to crank, had cardiac and digestive system problems and was born 10 weeks premature. Doctor Namir had told the staff once the baby was born that he had a 20% chance of living and although Carrie put a brave front on inside she was crumbling down. No matter how long she had been working the news that a little kid had died or didn't have a chance at living anymore tore her heart apart, but for some reason hearing the news about this baby made her heart shatter into a million pieces.

They took the baby boy to the NICU and put him in an incubator and tried to give him the best medical attention they could before they made there next move which would be surgery to repair the heart and digestive problems, but even with the surgery there was a possibility that he wouldn't make it. All they could do was hope for the best and that the baby's family would authorize the surgeries to try and save the baby's life.

Carrie had been occupied with trying to take care of the baby that she didn't even know if the baby's family had been informed of the situation. When she asked one of the nurses she was told that as far as she knew no one had gone to inform the family, since both Doctor Namir and Doctor Knowles were busy with planning out the surgeries and running more tests on the baby.

Carrie told the nurse that she was going to go inform the family of the situation, when she got a nod in return she quickly grabbed the chart and made her way towards the waiting room.

When she rounded the corner she stopped when she saw a woman standing and talking with some bikers. One of them had their back towards her, so she was able to see the back of the cut.

She slowly approached and cleared her throat.

The conversation quickly stopped and they all turned to look at her.

Before she could open her mouth to speak the woman who was in her 50's with brown hair and blonde highlights immediately asked, " How's my grandson?"

Carrie looked down at the chart trying to buy her some time and find a way to tell them the current situation the baby was in.

She cleared her throat and looked up at them before calmly saying, " He was born 10 weeks premature, addicted to crank and has digestive and cardiac problems. The digestive and cardiac problems can be fixed with surgery."

The woman raised her eyebrow at her before saying, " There's something you're not telling us. So if I were you I'd spill it now."

Carrie took a deep breath before saying, " The doctors say he has a 20% chance of living. If they perform the surgeries it increases the chance of survival for him but not by a long shot. The decision now is up to the family of the baby whether or not they authorize the surgeries."

I looked to the man next to the woman when he muttered _shit_ and ran his hands through his blonde shoulder-length hair.

After a couple of seconds of silence, the woman finally said, "Authorize the surgeries. Just save my grandsons life."

Before she could answer, Doctor Knowles appeared next to her. The atmosphere in the room quickly changed and you could feel the tension in the room.

Carrie looked back and forth between Doctor Knowles and the baby's family before she said, " I'll go and get the authorization papers."

She quickly made her way towards the NICU where Doctor Namir was still figuring out the best way to treat the baby's health problems.

She told him that the family had given there authorization and he said that he was going to go and explain the procedure and have them sign the papers before scheduling the procedure.

Once Doctor Namir left,, she was the only one in the room besides the baby. As she looked at the baby boy she couldn't help the tears that welled up in her eyes when she saw the baby connected to all the tubes that were helping him stay alive.

She took a deep breath trying to calm her nerves before taking one last look at the baby and walking away to continue doing her shifts.

In between her shifts Carrie would always go and check in on the baby.

When the end of her shift finally arrived, she clocked out but before making her way towards the locker room to get her belongings to go home, she stopped by and checked on the baby boy.

When she finally made it home she let out a long sigh of relief before dropping down on her couch.

A little while later she made her way into her room and changed out of her work clothes and into something more comfortable before making her way towards the kitchen and making herself something to eat.

She watched T.V for a while before making her way towards her room and falling asleep. The last thought she had was that she hoped everything would be alright and that that baby boy would have a chance at living a long and happy life.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

The next when Carrie woke up, she looked at the clock and noticed that she didn't have to be at work until noon but Doctor Namir had informed her of the baby's surgery this morning and she wanted to know how it went.

She quickly showered and changed into a pair of purple scrubs, put some eyeliner and mascara and pulled her hair into a ponytail before pinning back her bangs so they formed a little bump.

She made herself a bagel, grabbed some coffee and her bag before leaving her apartment and making her way towards the hospital.

Once she arrived and had parked her car, she immediately made her way into the hospital and towards her floor. As she passed the waiting room she saw the baby's grandmother along talking to a blonde woman who was holding a brown teddy bear. She wanted to know how the surgery had gone but didn't know if it was the right thing to do. Especially since the woman had a _fuck with me or my family and I'll tear you to pieces _attitude and Carrie definitely didn't want to get on her bad side. The urge to know what was happening with that baby boy overcame all caution and she quickly made her way towards the pair.

* * *

As soon as Gemma looked up from the conversation she was having with Luanne, she noticed the nurse that had told her about her grandson's condition making her way towards them. As soon as Carrie was a foot or so away all conversation stopped and both Gemma and Luanne looked up at the nurse. When Carrie was standing in front of them, Gemma could see that she had this attitude and confidence as she walked and stood in front of them, that would make her a great addition to the old ladies of the club but that didn't mean that Gemma trusted her or anything. Of course Gemma admired those qualities in someone but that didn't mean that she had to like the person especially some stranger who was obviously new to Charming.

So as the brown eyed, blonde haired nurse dressed in purple scrubs stopped in front of them Gemma couldn't help but look at her with a blank expression.

Gemma raised her eyebrow at the nurse before asking, " Is there something you want to tell me or ask me?"

Gemma noticed that the nurse glanced at Luanne before saying, " I just wanted to know if you had any news on your grandson's surgery."

Gemma stared at the nurse for a moment before saying, " They took him into surgery about an hour or so ago. Haven't really heard anything else but I'm sure that Abel is going to be fine. He's a Teller so that makes him a fighter."

The nurse nodded before saying, " I'm sure everything will go great. I'm Carolyn Blake by the way," she stuck her hand out before saying, " I hope you didn't mind me asking about your grandson Abel Mrs..."

Gemma looked at the nurse before shaking her hand and saying, " Gemma Teller-Morrow but just call me Gemma."

Carrie nodded before glancing at the blonde who had been watching the exchange and sitting next to Gemma.

Gemma noticed and said, " This is my friend Luanne, she came here to keep me company while Abel is in surgery."

Carrie nodded and shook hands with Luanne before saying, " Well I should get going but if I hear any news on Abel, I'll stop by and let you know."

* * *

With that said, Carrie turned around and made her way towards the locker room to put her stuff away.

When she stepped out and made her way towards the reception desk she saw Doctor Namir standing there filling out a chart.

Carrie quickly made her way towards him and said, " How did the surgery go?"

Doctor Namir turned to look at her and said, " Well good morning to you too Miss Blake. The surgery went well. That baby is a fighter. If he continues this way I'm sure he will have a long and healthy life."

When Carrie heard the news she visibly relaxed and let out a sigh of relief.

Doctor Namir looked at her with a raised eyebrow before saying, " Now Miss Blake if you don't mind me asking. Why do you have so much interest on this baby boy?"

Carrie looked at him and said, " I honestly don't know. It's just something about Abel. I think it's because of the hardships that he has had to go through and I guess that just made me have a soft spot for him."

Doctor Namir nodded before saying, " Well I'm glad you feel that way because that way I know that you will be giving him the best attention possible. I'm putting you as his primary nurse. That means that while you're here working you will mostly be on his case but you will be helping other patients as well."

Carrie quickly nodded and accepted the offer before saying, " Have you informed his family?"

Doctor Namir nodded before saying, " Doctor Knowles went to inform them, once we had him settled into a room in the NICU." when he saw the look on Carrie's face he said, " Even though the surgery went well. We still need to keep a close eye on him in case something goes wrong. He will probably be in there for a week or two or maybe more, at least until we know he is fully on the way to recovery."

Carrie nodded before grabbing Abel's chart from Doctor Namir when he handed it to and made her way towards the NICU.

When she arrived to the little room he was in she walked walked up and checked everything to make sure everything was good. She then checked his vitals and performed a whole procedure to make sure he was well.

When she finished she put the chart on the counter next to the incubator Abel was in before walking back and looking down at him. She couldn't help but let a small smile spread. As she looked at him, she realized that everything was going to be alright because he looked like a fighter and knew he would pull through this.

She reached her hand in and when she felt him wrap his little hand around her finger, she felt an overwhelming urge to make sure he well and protect him from everything. It was like a switch had clicked in her and she wanted to be there to protect him.

As she looked at him with his little hand wrapped around her finger she said, " You're going to make it Abel. You're a fighter, I just know you are."

As Carrie was busy at the moment with Abel, she didn't notice that Gemma was standing around the corner watching her interaction with her grandson.

If she had turned she would have seen the smirk Gemma had on her face before pulling her cell phone out and making a phone call to a certain intelligence officer to get all the information he could on a certain Carolyn Blake. She wanted to know everything she could about the little nurse. Especially if she was going to be hanging around her grandson. if it wasn't bad enough to have Tara, the little bitch who broke her son's heart, around she was wasn't going to let someone else come and destroy her family.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

_**Two weeks**_ had passed and as each day passed, Carrie noticed how Abel was doing remarkably well on his recovery from the surgeries that saved his life and just like Gemma had mentioned, he was a little fighter and Carrie could see it.

In the two weeks that had passed, she had yet to see Abel's father. She had only seen Gemma visiting her grandson but she had yet to see his father. She wondered sometimes if he father even wanted him. Often at times she would get angry when she rounded the corner and only saw Gemma visiting Abel. She wanted to find his father and talk smack some sense into him about how it was important for him to be there for his son.

It was the middle of the third week and Abel had been moved from the NICU and into a more private nursery in the hospital. She rounded the corner towards Abel's room to do her routine check up, when she stopped in her tracks as she saw the blonde haired guy with the Sons of Anarchy cut she had seen the day Abel was born. She slowly made her way towards the room and stopped in the doorway when she heard him softly talking to Abel.

She walked into the room and the guy looked up at her. She noticed that tears were welling in his eyes, which she noticed were a hypnotizing shade of blue.

Before he could talk she said, " I'm Carrie, Abel's nurse and I'm just here to do the routine check up. I'll be out of here in a little bit."

She walked towards the incubator and couldn't help but smile when she noticed that Abel was awake.

After Carrie made sure everything was alright, she turned to the guy standing in the corner of the room near the incubator.

She looked at him and said, " I assume you're Abel's father?"

He looked up at her from where he was staring at Abel and said, " Yeah, I'm Jackson Teller but everyone just calls me Jax."

Carrie nodded before saying, " Well Abel is doing really well. He certainly is a fighter just like your mother said he was."

* * *

He nodded and walked closer to look down at Abel. Carrie could see the love Jax had for his son and saw that it was hard for him seeing and knowing what his son had to go through at a very young age. The anger and disappointment she had felt when she thought about when she hadn't seen Jax visiting Abel melted away and instead she felt compassion towards him.

She put the chart on the counter and smiled down at Abel. When she put her hand in the incubator Abel immediately grabbed onto her finger and Carrie's smile just got bigger.

While she was staring at Abel, she didn't notice that Jax was staring at her interacting with his son. He could see nothing but love in her eyes for his son and in some weird way he wished that Abel would have had better luck with having a mother who looked at him the way Carrie did so he would know the love of a mother but instead he got a crank addicted croweater as a mother who just couldn't get clean. He felt bad for his son but he knew that he wouldn't be unloved because he had his family to care and love him but it wasn't the same as having a loving and caring mother there for him.

Jax was so busy staring at Carrie and Abel while Carrie was busy with Abel that neither of them noticed Gemma standing in the corner watching the interaction between the three of them.

* * *

In the two weeks that had passed Gemma had gotten the info that she wanted on Carolyn Blake. She knew everything about her. She had to admit that she felt some sort of compassion towards the nurse after everything she had been through growing up and she had to admit the she respected and admired the nurse on some level because she didn't let her life go to shit after everything she had been through.

Gemma never liked anyone who was a stranger and seemed to be getting to close to her family especially her son but she had to admit that if she had to choose between the nurse and the little doctor bitch to be in her son and Abel's life, then she would rather choose the little nurse than the woman she held a grudge against for hurting her son the way she did ten years ago.

As she continued to look in on the little scene she had to admit that they resembled a family. Carrie portrayed the loving and caring mother Abel will never have and Jax was the father who would protect them until his death.

She saw Carrie grab the chart and start to walk towards the door and Gemma decided to leace and make it seem like she was barely arriving.

So as Carrie rounded the corner she saw Gemma making her way towards Abel's room. Both women nodded towards each other before making their way towards their destinations.

* * *

Some time had passed since the first encounter between Jax and Carrie and every time Carrie would go and check on Abel, Jax was always there. They had started talking the second day he had gone to visit Abel and she had to admit that he was attractive but the two had become quickly become friends although they couldn't deny that they both felt an attraction towards each other.

During the conversations they had, Carrie brought up the fact that it was obvious that there was some tension between Doctor Knowles and his mom and Jax told her that he used to date Tara a while back and that when she had left ten years ago it had shattered his heart, so the reason for the tension was the fact that neither of them liked each other and the fact that his mom held a grudge against Tara didn't help settle the tension.

After that conversation she understood why Gemma couldn't see Tara and why Jax acted the way he did when Tara was around.

It was a couple of days after the conversation and nearing the weekend. Carrie was glad for the fact that she would have the weekend free and would be able to check out the fair she had heard her coworkers talking about.

As she made her way towards Abel's room, she couldn't help but feel some butterflies when she saw Jax in the room as always. She smiled a little before making her way in.

She noticed that Jax was reading a book to Abel and her smile widened.

When Jax looked up she was still smiling.

He put the book down before giving her his famous grin and saying, " Hey."

She looked at him and said, " Hey. I didn't know you read to Abel."

He nodded before saying, " Yeah. It gives me something to do."

she nodded before making her way and checking on Abel. Once she made sure everything was good she wrote his vitals in the chart.

Once she was finished Jax said, " So the Taste of Charming is this weekend are you planning on going?"

Carrie turned around and said, " I think so. I'm not sure yet."

Jax nodded before saying, " Well if you do end up going I'll see you there. Maybe we could check it out."

She raised her eyebrow and smiled before saying, " Is that you trying to ask me to go with you?"

He gave her his famous panty dropping grin and said, " I would really like it if you went there with me."

She smiled and looked down at her feet before looking up at him and saying, " I'd like that."

* * *

While they had their little moment they didn't notice that Tara had seen the interaction between them. She didn't like the fact that Jax seemed to be flirting with the nurse. Tara still had feelings for Jax, so seeing him like that made her feel jealous because it wasn't her who was getting his attention.

As Tara looked on at their display, she didn't notice that Gemma had just gotten out of the elevator. She made her way towards her grandson's room and stopped when she saw Tara. When she was close enough to see what the doctor was looking at she couldn't help but smirk because she what she saw was enough to guess that something was going on between her son and Abel's nurse. As she looked on she saw Jax with his hand on Carrie's lower back and they were both standing close together and every once in a while they would look up and smile at each other.

She saw how Tara was just looking at them and couldn't help but add a little fuel to the fire that she was sure was slowly burning as jealousy.

She leaned in a little and said, " Don't they make a happy family?"

Gemma noticed that Tara tensed and turned around before saying, " Jax only wants an easy lay. There is no way that something is ever going to happen between them."

Gemma smirked before saying, " Are you sure about that Tara? You left ten years ago. You may have been his old lady, which if I do say so myself was a stupid mistake on my son's part because you couldn't handle this life. So I wouldn't go around thinking you have a chance with him again because if I was able to choose for him. There is no way in hell I would choose you. I would choose Carrie to step into the role of mom and old lady in my son and Abel's life."

Tara looked at her before saying, " Well it's not up to you. Jax is a big boy who can make his own decisions and if he wants to be with her or me isn't really any of your business now is it?"

" Honey it is my business because I wouldn't ant some little bitch who runs when thins get tough in their life."

After Gemma said that she made her way towards her grandson's room and left a very pissed and jealous Tara standing there looking in on them. Tara always knew that Gemma didn't like her and she had to admit that she wasn't very fond of Gemma either but knowing that she was on team Carrie only made her even more pissed and jealous and she knew she had to get Jax back even if it was the last thing she did.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

It was now Saturday and Carrie was getting ready to go to the Fun Town Carnival. She took a shower before getting dressed. She wore a red long sleeve plaid shirt with a black spaghetti strap shirt under, light wash jeans, black converse and a red beanie. She had her hair curled with her bangs pinned back. She put on eyeliner, mascara and some lip gloss before putting some perfume on and grabbing her phone, some money and her car keys before leaving her apartment and making her way towards the fair.

She parked her car and noticed that the whole town seemed to have come to this fair. As she got out of the car she noticed the motorcycles parked near the entrance and she couldn't help the little fluttering in her stomach knowing that Jax was already there.

They had agreed to meet by the ticket booth at one and as she looked at her phone it was three minutes until one. She walked in to the fair grounds and as soon as she looked towards the ticket booth she could see Jax making his way to wait for her.

She quickened her pace and as soon as she was standing close to him she said, " Hey there stranger."

* * *

When Jax heard this he turned around and couldn't help but smiled in relief when he saw Carrie standing there in front of him.

He looked at what she was wearing before looking back up at her and saying, " Hey yourself. So you ready to check it out stranger?"

Carrie smile before nodding. They walked over to the ticket booth and purchased the amount of tickets they wanted. Since they wanted to check every game and ride that was available they each got 100 tickets.

As they walked into the fair, Jax intertwined their fingers. Carrie smiled as she looked up at Jax and she managed to laugh when she saw him smirk.

* * *

They rode the bumper cars first, then went off into the haunted house before making their way to one of the roller coasters that were set up.

As they were passing the haunted house, they saw Gemma and Clay making their way out of the photo booth laughing and looking at the pictures.

Some of the other guys from the club joined them as well.

They were talking for a while when they heard, " Mom can I please have more tickets? I want to go on some more of the rides."

They all turned and saw Elliott Oswald his wife Karen and daughter Tristan walking their way.

Elliott stopped and said hello. They were talking for a couple minutes before starting to walk away.

Carrie saw that Tristan was disappointed since she didn't have anymore tickets.

She turned and said, " Hey Tristan!"

When Tristan turned around, Carrie walked over towards her with Jax following behind and said, " Here you can have my tickets."

Before Tristan could say anything Jax said, " You can have my tickets too."

Tristan accepted the tickets with a big smile and a thank you before walking towards her parents.

Carrie and Jax continued to walk around hand in hand. The sun was just starting to set when Jax pulled Carrie to the side of one of the stands where it would give the some privacy.

Before Carrie could say anything, Jax kissed her. The simple kiss soon deepened and turned into a full blown make out.

When they finally pulled apart they were both breathing heavily but they both had huge smiles on their face.

Carrie started to ask what the kiss was all about when she was cut off by someone yelling.

They walked back towards the crowd to see what was going on. They saw Karen Oswald yelling out her daughter's name and asking everyone if they had seen her.

Jax leaves Carrie behind to go and search for Tristan. Gemma and Carrie wait around and try to console Karen Oswald. When Carrie looks towards the front of the fair grounds. She notices an ambulance and cop cars.

A couple of minutes later Hale come walking towards them with an expression on his face that Carrie can't read.

He looks at Karen and tells her that they found Tristan but they are taking her to St. Thomas. She quickly leaves with Hale and leaves Gemma and Carrie behind trying to figure out what could have happened.

The guys come back and they all have the same expression of anger on their faces. Carrie was confused because she thought that they would be happy that Tristan was found.

She was thinking about it until she heard Gemma ask what had happened. When she heard Clay answer by saying that they had found Tristan out by the woods and that she was raped all color from Carrie's face drained at the mere thought of what had happened.

Jax saw the color drain from her face and immediately pulled her into him and kissed her head. He told the guys that he would see hem at the clubhouse and walked away from the group with Carrie still in his arms.

She was trying not to cry but hearing what had happened to the girl that had been happy a couple of hours ago being raped in a small town like Charming completely took her off guard.

Once they had reached her car. She looked up at Jax and couldn't help the tears that welled in her eyes.

* * *

When Jax saw how broken she looked, he pulled her into him and held her. He himself couldn't believe what had happened in Charming. He couldn't believe that someone had done this in Charming, the town that the Sons had worked hard to make sure that nothing bad happened in _their_ town.

Yet a girl had been raped tonight and the thought of it just made him and the rest of the Sons sick to their stomachs that someone would come into their town and do that. They knew that no one in that town would do anything like this because they knew better or at least he thought they knew better but after what happened tonight he couldn't be so sure.

He knew that they were going to figure out who had done this and when they did they were going to make sure that the person who raped Tristan got what they deserved.

Jax was completely lost in his thoughts , that he didn't notice Carrie looking up at him.

When she asked, " Jax. What are you thinking about?" He was startled out of his thoughts.

He looked down at her before saying, " I was just thinking about how this could have happened here. Nothing like this ever happens in a small town like this."

She nodded wondering the same thing. Even though she hadn't lived here for a long time she knew that it had the atmosphere of a pleasant little town where everyone knew each other and nothing bad happened in it.

He looked at her before saying, " I'll be follow you home and make sure your safe. After what happened tonight, I don't want you being alone, especially if whoever did this is still out there."

she nodded before opening the car door, before she got in Jax turned her around and kissed her.

" I'll be behind you the whole way." She nodded before getting into her car.

He made his way towards his bike and pulled out of the parking lot behind her. He followed her all the way home and made sure that she got into her apartment safely before leaving and making his way towards the clubhouse.

He knew that they would make sure that the person responsible for Tristan's rape got what they deserved because the Sons made sure that Charming stayed drug free and that stuff like this didn't happen in their town.

He thought about how if it had been Carrie who had been in Tristan's shoes whoever had been responsible would be dead by now.

As he though that, he realized that he was starting to fall for hard Carrie and he didn't know what was going to happen.

With Tara being back in town it had brought up old feelings to the surface again and he didn't know what to do.

Sure he was starting to fall for Carrie but she didn't know about the club, she only knew that they were a a group of guys who were into riding motorcycles, she didn't know about the outlaw part.

With Tara she knew everything and had been his old lady before she left but he still had some hard feelings towards her for leaving ten years ago.

He also had his son to think about and he knew that the decision he made would have to be what was best not only for him but for Abel as well.

As he kept thinking about it he knew that he had to make a decision and he had to make one quick because he didn't want to lead Carrie on and break her heart if he chose Tara but he also didn't want to choose Tara and have her leave again like she did the last time they were together.

He decided to put it in the back of his mind for now and think about what they were going to do about what happened tonight at Fun Town and focus on that.

Once it was over with, then he would contemplate more on what he was going to do about his love life. Whoever he chose he knew that he was going to take it slow and not rush into things because he didn't want to get his heartbroken again and he sure as hell didn't want his kid to be caught in the middle if that happened. So he really had to make the best choice so he wouldn't have to deal with the consequences of making a wrong decision for the second time in his life.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Sorry it took me so long to update this story but its been kind of hectic with school and trying to keep my grades here I want them that I haven't really had time to update. But as an apology to those who have been reading my story here is a long chapter that you will hopefully enjoy.**

* * *

CHAPTER SIX

A couple of weeks had gone by since the Fun Town incident. SAMCRO had dealt with the guy who had raped Tristan and Abel was showing improvement by making a good and strong recovery. Doctors had informed Jax that if Abel continued on the path of recovery he was on, then he would be getting out of the incubator or as Jax called it "the toaster" soon.

During that time Jax had been acting weird with both Carrie and Tara because he didn't know who he had stronger feelings for. On one end he had Tara who had been his old lady and knew the lifestyle he lived, but she had broken his heart when she left and never came back until now and because of that he had let himself wallow in misery, booze,weed and pussy. That's how he ended up married to Wendy and making the biggest mistake of his life but the one thing he didn't regret was his son because even though he had fucked up by marrying Wendy, the only good thing to come out of it was Abel.

He didn't know if he could take another chance with Tara and risk getting his heart broken if she left again because she couldn't handle the lifestyle when it got rough.

On the other end was Carrie, the nurse who for some reason had made him feel something towards her from the moment he saw her with Abel.

Unfortunately, she didn't know anything about the lifestyle and it was too early to know if she was the one and whether she could be the old lady that would stand by his side when he would become president, there wasn't a doubt in his mind about whether or not she would be a good mom to Abel. From what he already saw, he could tell that she would be a great mother because she was already good with him. The only problem was would she embrace the life or would she leave and never look back as soon as things got tough.

No matter who he chose he knew that there was a possibility of him getting his heart broken, but what worried him the most was that he didn't want either Tara or Carrie to be in his son's life only to run away when things were rough. He didn't want Abe; to think of one of them as his mom, only for one of them to bail when things got rough and leave his son wondering where his "mom" is.

* * *

During the time where he wondered who was the best choice and who he had stronger feelings for, his mother hoped that he didn't make a mistake and end up taking Tara back because she had already broken his heart once and she didn't want to see her son go back to the way he was after the little bitch had run off the first time.

On the other hand she also didn't want some stranger in her grandson's life but even she had to admit that out of both women, Carrie would be the better choice because she hadn't done anything to be on her bad side...yet.

* * *

During these past couple of weeks Carrie knew something was wrong with Jax by the way he was acting every time she was around, if she had to guess, she figured it had something to do with Tara as well.

She wasn't blind, she knew what was going on or at least she had an idea of what was happening. She had also gotten a quick briefing from the towns deputy chief to stay away from SAMCRO because they were bad people. Some of he co workers had also been telling her what they knew about them but even with everything she heard she wasn't going to treat them any differently and she was going to keep taking care of Abel and taking to Jax until he told her that he didn't want anything to do with her.

Until then, everyone could go screw themselves because as far as she was concerned it didn't matter what people said about them because from what she could see they never acted like criminals. Sure they didn't like the law and often times tended to break it by doing something but they still seemed like good guys.

The one time that Carrie and Jax had an actual conversation in the past couple of weeks, they had talked about Tristan and Carrie had asked him if the cops knew who the guy was or if they had caught him. Jax had answered by telling her that the guy had been taken care of and that he wouldn't hurt anybody else.

Now that she thought about it, she guessed that SAMCRO had something to do with it and if she guessed on how he was taken care of, she would have to say that they most likely killed the guy and in some way she was relieved that SAMCRO had taken care of it. Even if Jax hadn't told her it was them or how, she was glad that the guy wouldn't harm anyone anymore.

In those past weeks, Carrie had also gotten to know Donna, Opie's old lady. Donna had even explained to Carrie what an old lady was, when she had looked at her funny when she mentioned it. They had gotten to know each other when Donna had taken the kids for a check up and Carrie had been their nurse. They had started talking about how Donna and Opie had seen Carrie and Jax together and how they looked like a cute couple.

Carrie had explained how they weren't actually together and how it was more of a going together as friends thing. Donna didn't believe it one bit and when she told her how she had seen them in an intense lip lock that had caused Carrie to blush before saying that it was just a spur of the moment thing.

They had laughed and from that day, they had been constantly talking and going to lunch whenever their work schedules allowed it. Carrie liked having someone to talk to and having an actual friend in town that she could talk to about anything and Donna liked having someone who she could talk to that wasn't involved with the club.

Now as Carrie made her way towards Abel's room to do her routine check up on him, she couldn't help but wonder whether Jax would be there and if it would be like any other day when he would stay quiet and stare at her as she checked on Abel but wouldn't say anything even as she was leaving.

As she neared the room she felt a little disappointed, when she didn't see Jax there but as soon as she entered the room and saw Abel her disappointment went away and was replaced by a calm and happy feeling by seeing him awake and healthy.

When she was done with the routine check up, she put Abel's chart down and walked over to the incubator and put her hand in. as soon as her hand was in, Abel grabbed a hold of her finger and held on to it while looking up at her with those eyes that were the same as his father's.

As she looked down at him and held his little hand she couldn't stop the smile that came upon her face. " Hey little guy. You're getting stronger and better every single day. Soon you'll be able to get out of the toaster as your daddy calls it," she laughed a little, " I'm glad your healthy and before you know it you'll be at home with your daddy and family that loves you very much."

She looked at Abel, "You're starting to look like your daddy and if you act like him when you're older you'll be a little heart breaker because every girl will be after you."

It seemed like Abel could understand her because as she said that he smiled a little up at her and that caused her to smile and tears to well up in her eyes.

She smiled at him, " Just remember to treat them right and if your anything like your daddy I know you'll grow up to be a good guy. Just remember to be proud of your daddy and family no matter what people say because they are good people and they love you very much."

Since Carrie was so busy talking to Abel she didn't notice Jax and Gemma standing in the doorway, so when she heard someone clear their throat it caused her to jump and quickly turn around. When she saw who it was, she blushed and grabbed the chart before informing them that Abel was doing well. Excusing herself she tried to make it out of the room quickly so it wasn't so awkward anymore.

* * *

As Carrie walked out the door Gemma turned to Jax and raised her eyebrow, when she saw him make a move to go after her. Before she could say anything, Jax was already out the door and trying to catch up with Carrie.

Gemma walked towards the incubator and looked down at her grandson before saying, " I hope your dad makes the right decision and chooses the little nurse. At least she hasn't broken your daddy's heart and is on my good side so far."

While Gemma stayed with Abel, Jax quickly followed after Carrie. He followed her down an empty hallway. As he caught up with her he grabbed her arm and spun her around so she was facing him.

* * *

Before she could say anything he crashed his lips onto hers and moved walked back until her back hit the wall. He wrapped his arm around her waist while he cupped the back of her head. Carrie wrapped both arms around his neck, while the kiss quickly turned into a more demanding kiss.

When they finally pulled apart they were both breathing hard and Carrie had a confused expression on her face.

She looked into his eyes, " What was that for? You have been acting really weird lately."

He looked at her, " I had to figure some things out."

" You had to figure out somethings? Like whether to go back to Tara or move on?"

He looked at her before nodding.

She smiled at him, " So I take it you made your choice?"

He smirked before cupping her cheek and kissing her again.

* * *

While Jax and Carrie were in their own little world, they didn't notice Tara heading their way. She was walking towards Abel's room hoping to talk to Jax but what she saw made her stop in her tracks. As she saw Jax kissing Carrie she couldn't help the overwhelming feeling to pull her off him and show her that he wasn't on the market but she had to be honest with herself she didn't have any claim to him. Jax was free game, he wasn't her old man anymore, sure she still had his crow on her but she had given the right to be his old lady up when she left Charming and now she had to watch him moving on but she was going to do whatever she had to do to show him that she was meant to be his old lady. She turned around and headed back the way she came from to do her rounds before they saw her.

* * *

When Jax pulled away he smiled at her, " How about me and you go out tonight. Spend some needed time together."

Carrie nodded before smiling and giving him a kiss. " I should get going before I get side tracked by you and get fired."

Jax smirked but let her go. " So I'll see you later. I'll pick you up at 7."

Carrie nodded before turning around and continued to make her way down the hall.

* * *

Jax watched her walk away and his eyes traveled down. When he looked up he saw her smirk at him before turning the corner and disappearing from his view. He turned around and made his way towards his son's room.

* * *

The time went by fast and before Jax or Carrie realized it was a couple of hours before their date. Carrie had clocked out of work and Jax was in the middle of Church, waiting for it to be over so he could get ready to pick up Carrie.

* * *

While Jax was stuck in Church, Carrie was on her way home to get ready.

Once she arrived home she cleaned her apartment to make it more presentable before taking a shower.

Once out of the shower, she changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt before blow drying her hair.

Once her hair was dry she left it in waves. She started doing her make up. She didn't want to put on a lot of make up so she left it to the essential which consisted of powder, blush, eyeliner, mascara and lip gloss.

She then started looking for an outfit. When she looked at the time she realized she only had about 15 minutes before Jax arrived to pick her up, so she decided on black skinny jeans, a white tank top and a black cardigan with some flats.

Once she was ready she made her way towards the living room to wait the 10 minutes she had left before Jax arrived.

* * *

Church had finished and they were all free to go and enjoy the party. As Jax was making his way outside and towards his bike, his prepaid started to ring. He took it out of his pocket and looked at the screen.

The name he saw made him furrow his eyebrows before answering.

"Tara?"

"Jax. Sorry to bother you but you told me that if Kohn bothered me again I could call you. Well his car is parked outside and I'm scared of what he might do."

Jax rubbed his hand across his face and sighed.

He pulled the phone away and looked at the time. " Alright. I'll be there in ten minutes."

He hung up the phone before walking towards his bike.

Once he was on, he tore out of the parking lot and made his way towards Tara's house.

What he thought would be a simple telling Kohn to leave Tara alone completing went down hill when he arrived and noticed the front door was open. He quickly took out his gun and made his way inside. He heard voices coming from the bedroom and made his way towards the room. He saw the bedroom door open and Tara standing in the middle of the room with a gun in one hand. He noticed she was shaking as he made his way into the room. The closer he got the better he could see the reason of why she was shaking. He saw Kohn on the floor in the doorway of the bathroom and bleeding from a bullet wound to the stomach.

He took the gun from Tara and put it on the dresser. Once he had the gun on the dresser he turned towards Tara and pulled her to him.

He was trying to comfort her when Kohn said, " Always running to your outlaw knight in shining armor. Too bad you will never be more than a biker whore."

After hearing him say that Jax pointed his gun at him and shot him in the head.

He put his gun on the dresser and looked at Tara. The way she looked so fragile and scared made him wrap his arms around her. Tara looked up at him and kissed him with everything she had. The kiss soon turned into something else as they both got lost in the feelings they had once had for each other. At that moment all thoughts of Carrie and their date left Jax's mind and all he could think of was being there with Tara.

* * *

Meanwhile Jax and Tara were in their own little world, Carrie was at home waiting on Jax to show up. As the minutes went by she kept hope that he was stuck at the clubhouse or was on his way already but as the minutes ticked by and they turned into hours she finally had to face the truth that she didn't want to believe. She had been stood up by Jackson Teller.

She felt tears well up in her eyes but she was trying not to let them fall because she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of having him know that she had cried over him while he was probably enjoying himself in booze and pussy or enjoying himself with Tara.

She went into her room and got ready for bed. She took off her make up and put on her pajamas. As she got into bed her phone vibrated, she checked the screen and saw that it was a message from Donna.

_So how was the date with Jax?_

As Carrie read the words she couldn't help the tears that rolled down her face.

She took a deep breath and wiped the tears away before typing back her reply.

_It didn't happen. He stood me up._

With that she threw the phone onto the bed and let herself cry because that was just a reminder of how he had most likely just played with her feelings and she felt truly alone with no one to comfort her in her time of need.


	7. Chapter 7

** A/N: I know it's been a while since I have updated and I apologize for that. It's just been a little hectic but I will hopefully be able to update more often now. I can't promise to update every single day, every week or set an update schedule because I'm not sure if I would be able to update on the set date. To be honest, if I was to set a schedule I'm sure that the chapter would be crappy because I would be rushing to post it on time. But I can promise to update sooner. I wan to thank all of you who have read and reviewed, it means a lot that you have taken the time to read and tell me what you think. I love to read what you guys think will happen, what you want to happen and whether you like the story or not. You can always PM with any question or suggestion you have and I will try to get back to you as soon as I can. I apologize for the long note and I hope you enjoy the new chapter.**

* * *

Chapter Seven

Carrie had woken up the next morning hoping that the night before had all been a horrible dream but unfortunately for her it had been reality.

As soon she remembered how she had been really happy and excited because Jax had chosen her, but now she realized that she had be foolish to believe that he really would have chosen a girl like her over his high school sweetheart who he had been in love with and was his old lady.

From what Donna had told her before, Jax had been really heartbroken when Tara had left all those years ago to pursue her dreams, so why wouldn't he jump at the opportunity to be with her now that she was back in town.

She knew that if she had been in his position, she would have chosen her high school sweetheart as well, well only if he wasn't the asshole he turned out to be, but given how he had actually seemed happy when he told her he had chosen her, she couldn't figure out why he would have lead her on only to leave her waiting for him to show up.

She couldn't automatically assume that he had changed his mind and was with Tara, but she wasn't stupid enough to make up excuses as to why he didn't show up.

The whole time she was getting ready to go to work, she kept thinking about why he would have stood her up. He would have called her to let her know that he wouldn't be able to make it right? No. He didn't owe her and explanation because they hadn't made it official. Sure he had told her that he had chosen her but he never asked her or told her that he was only going to be with her. Besides why would he choose her, a nurse, when he could have Tara, a successful doctor, who he had history with.

She was thankful that she only had to work half the day because she didn't know if she could deal with seeing him when she made her rounds and checked in on Abel. The best thing for her right now was to forget what had happened and act normal. She would just have to make sure she didn't see him and wait for him to tell her why he hadn't shown up, instead of her seeking him out and making herself look desperate.

Besides if Jax didn't want her, she wasn't going to waste her time begging him to be with her because there were plenty of fish in the sea. Her world did not revolve around Jackson Teller, no matter how good looking he was.

As she finished getting ready and made her way out of her apartment and towards her car. She couldn't help but feel that something was going to happen, she just didn't know what.

* * *

Donna had been majorly pissed to find out that Jax had stood up the girl she had started to consider as a little sister. She couldn't believe that he would lead her on and then leave her hanging. She wanted to find Jax and knock some sense to him but Opie wouldn't let her. He told her that it was between Carrie and Jax and that even though she care about her friend, she couldn't be getting into a situation that wasn't hers to get into.

She had told Opie that he was only saying that because Jax, or the asshole as she had so fondly called him last night, was his best friend and he would do anything to protect him. Opie had disagreed with her and had her assure him that she wouldn't get herself in the middle of the shit storm that was sure to be brewing between Carrie and Jax.

She hadn't answered him because she wasn't so sure she could just stand by and see her friend get her by Jax.

She knew that in order to fix this mess, she was going to have to ask for help. The only person she knew would help, was the queen bee herself. It was true that Donna didn't really like the club because Ope had to do five years because of a plan gone wrong but if she wanted to help Carrie out, she would have to suck it up and call on Gemma for help.

She knew that Gemma didn't want her son getting back with the doctor and Donna didn't really give a shit whether he stayed with Tara or not. She wasn't fine however when he decided to string Carrie around because she had already been through enough and she didn't deserve to get her hearty broken because Jax wasn't man enough to tell her from the beginning that he was going to get back with Tara.

Sure she didn't know what exactly happened that he didn't show up for the date, but she was going to get to the bottom of it and she knew that with the help of Gemma she was going to knock some sense into him about messing with her friend.

* * *

To say that Gemma was surprised to hear from Donna was an understatement. She knew that she disliked the club for what had happened to Ope and how she didn't want the club's help but to hear her ask for help and find out that her son had stood the nurse up left her speechless.

She knew that Jax had left the clubhouse last night as soon as church had ended, but to hear that he may have gone and changed his mind about starting over and forgetting that doctor bitch had her stepping on the gas and trying to get to the clubhouse to give her son a stern talking to.

He had not only left Carrie waiting for him to take her on a date, that he had promised, but now he might have gone and hooked up with Tara. The last one is what really had her pissed because after everything that little bitch did to him, he was just going to take her back like nothing happened? Well that wasn't going to happen if she had anything to do with it.

As she made her way into the TM parking lot she immediately new that her fear might have come true because Jax's bike wasn't parked in it's usual spot.

Gemma knew that as soon as her son arrived, shit was going to hit the fan because not only was she pissed that he was probably back with Tara, but he had Donna to deal with as well because she cared about Carrie and to have him hurt her by standing her up wasn't going to fly in her book.

She only hoped that her son was ready for the shit storm coming his way because if he wasn't then he was going to get knocked on his ass.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Gemma had been working in the office organizing the invoices, ordering parts they needed, when she heard the rumble of her son's Harley making it's way into the lot. She glanced at the time and saw that he was an hour late.

She shook her head, as she leaned against the doorway and saw him swagger up to the office.

He kissed her on the cheek and gave her a hug. " Hey ma. How's your morning going so far?"

As she looked at him, she noticed his signature smirk on his face. " Fine baby. How was your date last night with Carrie?"

As soon as she had uttered those words, the smirk on his face wiped right off. Now it was her turn to smirk. " Let me guess it didn't go so well."

He rubbed his face with his hands, before walking into the office and sitting in the chair across from where his mother usually sat.

Gemma sat in the chair across from him and waited for him to get his thoughts into place.

He looked at her and sighed. " It didn't happen."

"Did she cancel the date?" She knew what her son had done. She just wanted to see what he would say, so she decided to act like she didn't know what had happened.

He shook his head. " No. I stood her up."

She quirked her eyebrow at him. " Why would you do that to her Jackson? I taught you better than that. If you couldn't make you should have at least called her and let her know."

" I know ma, but I got a call and I had to take care of some stuff. Then I just forgot about it."

Gemma leaned forward and clasped her hands together in front of her. " You don't just forget something like this Jackson. What was so important about that call that you couldn't even remember to let the girl who _you_ chose to be with know that you couldn't make it?"

He sighed. " Tara called me and asked me to help her with something. I guess I just lost track of the time."

" So you went and helped out the little bitch who broke your heart? Did you fuck her?"

" Don't talk about her like that ma. It was a long time ago. And what if I did? It isn't your business to know who I sleep with or not."

" So you admit it. You actually left Carrie waiting for you, while you went and helped Tara with whatever the hell she needed help with, while the girl who didn't do anything to you, was waiting for you at home and you were off fucking the bitch who broke your heart."

Instead of answering anything, Jax walked out of the office. Of course luck wasn't on his side because as soon as he had stepped out Donna was on him like a pack of wolves.

" How could you do that to her Jax? Huh? Did you enjoy leaving her to wait for you without a damn phone call while you got your dick wet?"

He could see that Donna was pissed, since her face was starting to turn a shade of red.

" Donna. I told you to leave it alone and not get into something that you have no business in." Opie said walking towards where his best friend and his wife were standing.

" It's my business Ope because Carrie is like my sister. I can't let this jackass play with her feelings," she said gesturing at Jax who was ready to say something.

" Hey. Wait a minute. You don't have to insult me. I know I fucked up alright."

Donna glared at Jax. " Do you now? So you know that you fucked up? Really? Because I don't see you doing anything to right the wrong that you did. Carrie has already enough shit in her life. She doesn't need to be waiting around for some playboy asshole like you, that tells her he wants to be with her but then goes running at the first chance of getting his dick wet."

" Don't you think you're being a little to harsh on him?" Opie said looking between his friend and wife. " Besides you don't know what happened."

" Really Opie? Stop defending him. Just because he's your best friend doesn't mean shit. You can't defend him when he did something wrong."

Donna turned back to Jax. " So what's your excuse huh? Why couldn't you call and explain that you couldn't make it huh? What was so important that you couldn't schedule it for some other day."

Jax sighed knowing that he was going to get shit from Donna no matter what he said.

Before he could say anything, Gemma piped in. " He was with Tara last night."

He turned to glare at his mother and in return all he got was a simple shrug from.

Donna looked at him and scoffed. " Seriously? You went to see the bitch who left you brokenhearted when she left ten years ago? I hope it was worth it Jackson because I don't want you anywhere near Carrie. Looks like you made your choice huh?"

` " Look, Donna this was just something that happened. I'm sorry that I left her there waiting for me, but I honestly forgot about the date."

Donna shook her head. " Fuck you Jackson. That shit isn't something you just forget. Especially when you made the plans that same day. Besides I shouldn't be the one you apologize too because I'm not the one you stood up."

Donna looked at him and Opie one last time before walking away.

As she walked away she turned one last time. "And Ope. You're sleeping on the couch." she continued walking, got into her car and left T-M.

Opie sighed before looking at Jax. " Sorry about that. I told her not to get into shit that didn't concern her but she didn't listen."

Jax looked back at his mother, who had gone back into the office. " Don't worry about it Ope. She ain't the only one."

He looked around and notice that the rest of the guys had heard the entire thing and were barely going back to what they were doing, or at least were acting like they were actually working.

" She's right tho. You did fuck up. If you weren't sure about moving on from Tara, you shouldn't have said anything."

Jax sighed before lighting up a cigarette. " I know. It's just that, I was so sure about Carrie but then I went to Tara's and old feelings came back," he shook his head. " I just don't know what to do man. This is just fucked up."

Opie sighed. " I think you should talk with Carrie. Explain the situation to her, so she doesn't just assume the worst."

"Yeah. You're right, I'm sure she doesn't want shit to do with me now."

" Use that Teller charm. Maybe you'll get her to at least forgive you."

* * *

Carrie was thankful when her shift was almost over. It had been a long day and took make matters worse, she had heard from the rumor mill, that Jax and Tara were back together. She just wanted to get the hell out of that hospital so she didn't have to see Tara.

She had clocked out and decided to stop by and say bye to Abel before she left. Besides it wasn't his fault that his daddy had stood her up.

As she looked at Abel, she felt her heart break a little more because she really thought that Jax had meant what he said.

She hadn't been in there for very long when she heard, " I thought I could find you here."

She turned around and saw Jax standing in the doorway. " I was just leaving. Just came stopped by to say bye to Abel before I left."

He nodded. " How's he doing."

" He's fine. Vitals are normal and he's growing stronger every day." she looked at Abel and then at Jax. " I should get going. My shift is over anyway."

She made her way towards the door and Jax stepped aside.

She had barely taken a step out the door when Jax grabbed her arm. " I'm sorry about last night."

Carrie stepped out of his grasp and turned to look at him. " There's nothing to be sorry about. It was a stupid mistake that won't happen again," she walked away before turning back around. " Congratulations on getting back together with Tara. I hope you two are happy."

Jax took a step forward and said "Carrie-"

Carrie shook her head. He could see the tears welling up in her eyes. " Goodbye Mr. Teller. Have a nice life."

Jax stood there knowing that he had really fucked up and knew that Carrie had just walked out of his life because she thought that him and Tara had gotten back together.

He should have gone after her and explained but at that moment he didn't know think that anything he said would make a difference.

* * *

He didn't know that Carrie actually wanted him to explain everything. She was hurt, that was a given, but if he would have walked after her she would have maybe given them a second chance. Now the only thing that she could do was move on and hope she could get over him.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N:Thank you guys for voting and I have to say that the winner was Happy so I'm going try my best at portraying him but I can tell you that it may seem like the Happy in this story may be a little out of character as to the one in the show but I want to show another side of him besides the bad ass, scary biker you see on the show. Hopefully you guys like it and I can tell you that there's going to be a twist and if you guys can guess it I'll throw in a surprise for you. So read and review and I hope you guys enjoy.**

* * *

Chapter Nine

It was close to a month since Jax and Carrie's last encounter. Things had changed during those three and a half weeks. Carrie tried to move on and not think about Jax. In order to do that she avoided situations where she would run into him. She still checked on Abel during and after her shift, but she made sure to not go during the time Jax seemed to always visit him.

She just wanted time to make sure that seeing him wouldn't bring her close to tears by remembering what had happened. She was slowly starting to forget. Was she completely over it? No.

But that was at the beginning of those three and a half weeks. Now she just wanted to get on with her life and leave that situation in the past.

During that time she and Donna had gotten closer. In fact it was thanks to Donna that she was able to get over it faster than she would have on her own.

It was actually during the fourth week that Carrie and Donna had taken Ellie to get her hair cut and while there Carrie decided that in order to leave everything in the past, she had to change her look. And she did just that. She walked into the hair salon as blonde and came out as a brunette. Technically she was born a brunette and had been dying her hair blonde for a couple of years now, so to change it up she went with a deep coffee brown color.

It was different but it was close to her normal hair color that she didn't have to worry about her roots showing and it was the change she was looking for.

A new look to go with a new beginning, that she was hoping to make.

Now a month later, she had managed to evade running into Jax so far and she planned on keeping it that way.

* * *

It was Friday afternoon and her shift was just about to end when her phone vibrated indicating that she had a message.

She put the chart she was working on away, before clocking out and checking her phone.

It was a message from Donna asking if she wanted to meet up and spend some time with her and the kids since they were almost out of school.

She typed a quick reply on her way to the room Abel was in.

She put her phone away as she entered the room. As she looked at Abel. She couldn't believe how much he had grown in the last two months. Luckily he was growing stronger each day and he would soon be able to get out of the incubator. If things kept going as smoothly as they were now he would hopefully be out in the next week or so.

In a week or so he would be able to be held and feel the warmth of being in the arms of his family and she couldn't wait to see him out of the incubator.

She looked up at the clock and realized that if she didn't leave soon, she would run into the person she has been avoiding.

She quickly made her way towards the elevator and made it out of the hospital and into her car without running into him. Of course she still had a few minutes left and decided not to take any chance and made her way home.

As soon as she was home she took a quick shower and changed into a pair of ripped skinny jeans, black tank top and a white v-neck shirt on top.

She pinned her bangs to form a little bump, put on some eyeliner, mascara and quickly made her way towards her car and left to Donna and Opie's home.

She had barely gotten out of her car when Donna and the kids were walking out the door and towards the car in their driveway.

As Carrie walked up the driveway Donna smiled.

" Hey. I'm glad you decided to come."

Carrie smiled back before looking towards the car. " Hey. I wouldn't turn down the opportunity to hang out with my favorite people in the world."

" Awww I'm honored."

Carrie chuckled. " I was talking about the kids Donna."

" Whatever. Besides I'm the one who brought those kids into the world. And it's not like you're my favorite person in the world Carrie." Even though Donna had tried to say it with a straight face she couldn't help but laugh.

" Yeah well I'm sure you guys would be bored if I didn't spend time with you guys." Carrie laughed. " But on a more serious note. Are you guys heading somewhere because I can come back later."

Donna shook her head. " No. Well we were going to drop off some lunch for Opie and Piney." Donna carefully looked at Carrie's expression. " Why don't you come with us? That way we can go get something to eat or maybe go rent some movies or something?"

Carrie was going to protest when Donna said, " It's not like Jax is going to be there. So you don't have anything to worry about. I'm sure Jax is at the hospital visiting Abel. Besides we're going to be in and out of there in five minutes."

Carrie looked at Donna and then turned when she heard someone knock on the car window. She saw Ellie and Kenny doing a puppy dog face trying to convince her to go with them. She was going to decline when she saw Donna doing the same face as her kids.

Carrie sighed. " Fine but you owe me, if he shows up or is there. You know I don't want to see him." She saw that Donna was going to say something. " You know I'm over it. But it still doesn't mean that I want to have anything to do with him outside of work. Especially with him and Tara being together."

She saw the kids high five each other and shook her head when she saw the smile on Donna's face.

" Okay fine. Now get in the car Carrie."

Carrie slid into the passenger seat as Donna turned the car on. She couldn't believe that after a month, she was going to the clubhouse and see everyone again. Sure she had only seen them in passing and knew who they were because of the descriptions Donna had given her but going to the place where Jax practically lived made her nervous.

As they made their way towards T-M, she couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to happen.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I take back what I said in the last note. It seems like a lot of people seem to think it should be Hale instead of Happy. So Hale it is. Thank you guys for giving your opinion because even though you may think that it doesn't matter, to me it does because I want you guys to like the story and continue to read and review and see what you suggest come alive in the story. Your suggestions matter especially when I don't know what to write because you guys give me ideas that I can work with and make the story better and into something you will enjoy. So thank you guys and continue to read and review. If you have any questions or ideas that you want seen in the story PM me and we can work something out. In the mean time I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and I apologize if the note is long but I had to let you guys know.**

* * *

Chapter Ten

The nervous feeling that something was going to happen hadn't gone away since the moment they had pulled out of the driveway. Now that they were pulling into T-M, the feeling was even stronger that she thought she might throw up all over the inside of Donna's car.

Donna noticed that Carrie was starting to go pale and was starting to take faster and shorter breaths. She knew that it was because she was nervous, not knowing what she was getting herself into coming into what she would consider Jax's territory, especially after trying to not deal with him outside of work.

Donna felt bad for Carrie, seeing her like that. She turned around to face the kids. " Why don't you guys head inside? Carrie and I will head inside in a little bit OK?"

Kenny and Ellie nodded, got out of the car and made their way inside of the clubhouse.

As soon as the kids were out of the car Donna turned towards Carrie. " OK, spill what's going on through that head of yours?" seeing that Carrie was still breathing kinda fast she said, " Hey, take deep breaths and relax. Nothing is going to happen OK?"

Carrie nodded and started to take deep breaths. It helped her start to calm down enough that she didn't need to throw up but she still had that nervous feeling.

Carrie turned to look at Donna. " It's just that I have this nervous feeling that won't go away since we left your driveway. The fact that we're at T-M, where it's _his_ territory doesn't help the feeling that something is going to happen."

Donna laughed. " First of all, relax. Besides it's not like you guys are in rival gangs or anything. Besides this is a garage where everybody comes to get their car fixed. The only part that would you can't go in unless invited or welcomed is the clubhouse. Besides you're with me and it's fine if you go in."

" Now if we want to be in and out we have to get out of this car now."

Carrie nodded. They both made their way out of the car and towards the clubhouse.

Donna reached for the door and turned to Carrie. " Relax and act normal. Nothing is going to happen."

Before Carrie could respond Donna opened the door and walked in. not wanting to stay outside by herself Carrie quickly followed Donna inside.

She had never been inside the clubhouse before, hell she hadn't even been into the parking lot. But the inside of the clubhouse wasn't really different from what she had imagined. There was a bar on the right side, two double doors leading into a room, where she was sure they held their Church meetings, mug shots of the members, both past and present, on the wall next to the doors, pool table in the middle and tables and furniture scattered around the room. There was also a hall leading to what she assumed lead to the dorms or rooms where the guys slept and did other activities in.

She was too busy taking in her surroundings that she almost didn't hear someone ask, " So Donna whose your little friend over there?"

she looked where Donna was standing and saw Opie and four other guys sitting around a table.

Donna looked back at Carrie. " That's Carrie. And no Tig, she isn't going to sleep with you. So don't get your hopes up."

She noticed Donna addressing a guy with black curly hair and blue eyes. Now that she was in the same room as him she knew what Donna meant that he was someone she didn't want to be involved with. She knew not to judge someone based on their looks so she was going to be cautious but open minded when it came to him.

Donna motioned for Carrie to come over. Once she was standing next to her she looked at her and the guys. " Carrie you already know Opie, but this is his father Piney," she motioned to an older man who had an oxygen tank next to him, he nodded before Donna continued to introduce the rest of the guys.

"This is Tig. Chibs and Bobby." Donna pointed to the curly haired guy, then to a guy with scars on his cheeks and finally to a guy with long curly hair and a long beard to match.

" Hi. It's nice to meet you guys."

" Same here lass." The guy who she assumed was Chibs spoke with a Scottish accent. He reminded her somewhat of her father. He had the same kind brown eyes as her father and even though his hair was starting to gray she knew it was the same color as her father's.

She was broken out of her thought by a voice. " Besides it about time we got fresh meat around here."

she looked at Tig who had a smirk one his face.

" Not going to happen Tig. She isn't a crow eater or sweetbutt so leave her alone."

Tig looked at Donna. " You never let me have any fun. I just wanted to mess with her."

" Tig she's old enough to be your daughter. So I'm pretty sure if you ever slept with her it would be as if you were sleeping with your daughter."

Carrie watched as Tig shuddered. " When you put it that way. I think I'm better off going back to work. Way to deflate a mans ego doll face."

Carrie heard everyone laugh and watched a Tig made his way out of the clubhouse.

" Speaking of leaving we should get going as well. We only came to drop off lunch."

Donna leaned down and kissed Opie before kissing Piney on the cheek. Both Kenny and Ellie were already waiting by the door after saying their goodbyes.

Carrie said." It was really nice meeting you guys." Before making her way after Donna and the kids. As soon as she was in the car she let out a large exhale.

Donna laughed. " See that wasn't so bad now was it?"

Carrie only looked at her as if saying _you're kidding me right? _ as they made their way towards Main Street. But she had to admit that it wasn't what she was expecting. They seemed like a nice group of guys, except for the fact that they could easily kill you if they had to. But something about them made her feel safe. Like as long as she was on their good side and they were around nothing bad would happen.


	11. Chapter 11

**Happy Easter everyone. I hope you guys have a good day today spending it with you're loved ones. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Please read and review if you have any questions or suggestions you can always PM me or leave them in a review.  
**

* * *

Chapter Eleven

_**A week later **_Carrie had to work an extra shift at St. Thomas given the fact that they were short on nurses.

She had gotten the call at midnight and clocked in at work an hour later. All the while thinking that it wasn't fair that she had to come into work at an early hour because a couple of nurses were on maternity leave and some of the others decided to take a vacation for two weeks.

She understood that Thanksgiving was coming up and they wanted to spend it with their families but did they really have to leave for two weeks?

The fact was that she could bitch about it all she wanted and it wouldn't make a difference didn't make her feel any better, but she had known what she was signing up for when she decided to become a nurse. Sure she mostly worked with kids but when she needed to she would work with adults as well.

Finally after a thirteen hour shift, she couldn't be more happy to be going home. She had gotten some sleep in the waiting room but it seemed like as soon as she was going into a deep sleep her pager would go off, indicating that she had a patient to attend to or a doctor needed her help.

Now the only thing stopping her from clocking out and going home was the chart she had to finish filling out.

She had been lost in filling her last chart that she was startled when someone cleared their throat behind her.

Carrie immediately turned around and smiled when she saw Doctor Namir.

" I thought you would like to be the first to hear the good news involving our little fighter."

Carrie straightened up as she heard him say this. When word had spread among the staff of the baby who didn't have more than a 20% chance at living and he managed to go against all odds. The staff on the pediatrics wing had taken to calling Abel "little fighter" because he had fought to survive since the moment he was born.

It had amazed everyone how he had proven that miracles could happen, because if they were being honest they thought he wasn't going to make it. The fact that he was now a strong and healthy baby proved that he was a fighter, hence the nickname.

Carrie looked at Doctor Namir expectantly.

At first he didn't say anything. All he did was look at her with that smile that said _I know something that's going to make you lose your shit_.

After a couple of seconds, Carrie lost all the patience she had.

" So are you going to tell me the good news or not?" She snapped.

Realizing a little too late what she had done. Carrie's eyes widened and a blush had crept up her face.

She quickly added, " I'm so sorry. It's just you're not telling me anything and my shifts almost over. The fact that I haven't gotten any sleep, so my patience is running thin. Working a thirteen hour shift doesn't help. I don't know how you can do this on a day to day basis."

Doctor Namir chuckled. " It's alright Carrie. I completely understand how you feel. I feel the same way after a couple of shifts that are too long and have had hardly any sleep."

"Anyways the good news is that our, or should I say _your. _little fighter is getting out of the incubator tomorrow."

Carrie squealed. She saw Doctor Namir raise an eyebrow.

Carrie quickly cleared her throat. " I mean that's really good news."

" Indeed it is. And if everything goes well I don't see why he can't go home in time to spend Thanksgiving with his family."

Carrie was shocked at hearing the news. " That's great news. I'm sure his family is going to be really happy and excited."

Doctor Namir nodded. " I thought you would feel that way. Now I just came to tell you the good news. I'll let you get back to what you were doing. Have a good day Carrie."

"You too Doctor Namir."

When he walked away, she looked at the clock and saw that her shift was over. After a thirteen hour shift all she wanted to do was go home and sleep, but she had to do something before she was able to do that.

She clocked out and grabbed her things before making her way towards Abel's room. Seeing her favorite little guy always seemed to brighten up her day.

Once there she put her bag on the chair in the corner of the room and walked towards the incubator.

" Hey little guy. I've got some really good news for you."

As if knowing that what she about to say was important Abel opened his eyes and looked directly at her.

" Well now that I have you're attention. I guess I should just tell you the news huh?" Carrie let out a small laugh. " Well the good news is that you get out of this toaster, as your daddy calls it, tomorrow. The best part is that if everything continues to go smoothly. You'll be out of this hospital and at home with your family by Thanksgiving."

It seemed like Abel understood every word she said because he let out what she took as a little smile.

She stayed a couple of minutes longer before leaving.

Once in the car she was planning on going straight home but she knew that she had some news to deliver.

So instead of going straight home she made a detour to T-M. She only hoped that the person she was looking for was there and not off somewhere doing who knows what.

As she pulled into the lot she noticed the Charming PD jeep. She pulled into a spot and got out. Chief Unser along with another officer were standing by the jeep. The guys were standing in front of them and they seemed to be having a heated conversation as she walked up to them.

Chief Unser was the first one to notice her. " How are you Carrie?"

The conversation immediately stopped as they turned to look at her.

Jax had to admit that if Unser hadn't of called her by her name, he wouldn't have known that the person in front of him was Carrie. Long gone were the blonde locks, he had run his fingers through at Fun Town, now she was a brunette.

" I'm fine Chief Unser and you?"

" I'm hanging in there sweetheart."

Carrie nodded knowing what he meant. She had met him when he had gone in for a check up and she happened to be his nurse. He had cancer and planned to retire soon, so he could start his chemo treatments in hope that the cancer would go away.

Clay was the next one to speak."What can we do for ya sweetheart?"

"I need to talk to Jax. It's about Abel."

Jax looked at her and then turned towards the other officer. " We done? I have important things to do."

The other officer nodded before turning towards her. " I'm David Hale." He held out his hand.

Carrie shook his hand. " Carolyn Blake, but please call me Carrie." She let go of his hand.

Carrie turned to Jax. " Can we talk?"

Jax nodded before motioning for her to follow him. He led them into the clubhouse and towards his dorm.

Once inside he closed the door and waited for her to talk.

She looked around before facing Jax. " Doctor Namir gave me some great news. Abel's getting out of the toaster tomorrow."

Jax smiled. " That's really good news."

Carrie nodded. " Yeah it is. The best part though is that if everything continues to go well, he can go home next week."

" Seriously? That's really good news."

Carrie nodded. " Yeah it really is."

" Thanks for coming to tell me." Jax looked at Carrie. " Listen, Carrie about what happened-"

Carrie shook her head. " Don't worry about it Jax. It's in the past. Besides I'm over it."

Jax nodded. He was a little hurt that she didn't let him explain but if she didn't want to hear him out he couldn't force her to listen to what he had to say because he had no claim on her.

" I should get going. I just came by to tell you the news."

Carrie turned to walk away, when Jax grabbed her wrist.

Carrie turned to look at him.

" You're going to be there right?"

Carrie looked at Jax confused.

He saw her expression and realized that he hadn't been clear in what he meant. " I mean, you're going to be there when Abe; finally gets out of the toaster right?"

Carrie was shocked at what he was asking. " Do you want me there?"

Jax nodded. " Yeah. Besides you were there when he was born. You've been taking care of him. You might as well be there when he gets out as well."

Carrie thought about it for a few seconds. " Sure I'll be there."

Jax smiled." Good."

Carrie smiled and nodded. " I have to go but I'll see you tomorrow."

Jax nodded and watched as she walked out the door. He had to admit that he still had some type of feeling towards her.

Jax shook his head. Nothing could happen between them. He was back with Tara and was going to make it work with her this time. After all she was his high school sweetheart and the person who he couldn't forget. Some part of him would always love her and another part of him would wonder what would have been if he had gone on that date with Carrie.

He couldn't keep think about what if he had Tara and his son was getting out of the toaster tomorrow. Deciding that it was better if he got to work, he walked out of his room and made his way towards the garage.

Tomorrow he would be able to hold his son in his arms.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Carrie couldn't believe that the day had finally arrived. Abel was getting out of the incubator today.

It seemed like only yesterday he had been born and was fighting for his life. Now he was healthy and strong.

She looked at the clock and made her way towards Abel's room.

" Everything seems really good with him. If all continues to go well, Abel should be able to spend Thanksgiving with his family. " Doctor Namir informed Jax and Gemma.

When they nodded Doctor Namir checked his watch. " Well I should get going. I have to get ready for a surgery taking place soon." He motioned towards Carrie. " Nurse Blake will tell you anything you need to know."

With that said he walked out of the room after wishing them a good day.

Carrie was about to speak when she was interrupted by Gemma. " I have to make a phone call." She turned towards Jax. " I'm going to tell Clay the good news so he can tell the guys."

When Jax nodded, Gemma made her way out of the room.

That left Jax, Carrie and Abel alone in the room. There was a little tension between the two adults, since neither of them knew what to say.

Carrie finally broke the silence. " Ready to hold your son?" Carrie asked as she bundled Abel in a blanket.

" Ready."

Carrie looked at Jax and noticed that he seemed nervous.

" Everything is going to be alright. Just make sure to support his head." Carrie gave him a small smile, before picking Abel up.

"Ready?"

Jax seemed to relax a little. " Yeah. I'm ready."

She slowly walked towards Jax and placed Abel into his father's arms for the first time.

Carrie stepped back and couldn't help but smile at the sight of Jax holding his son. To some people it would seem like an odd picture. A biker holding a baby, but to her it seemed right. She could see a whole different side of Jax as he held Abel. Long gone was the cocky and tough biker. Instead, in front of her was just a regular guy who loved and would do anything for his son.

Jax looked up at Carrie. " Do you want to hold him?"

Carrie looked at Jax. " Are you sure?"

Jax nodded and looked down at Abel before slowly walking towards Carrie.

Jax placed Abel into Carrie's arms.

Carrie looked down at Abel. She had held a soft spot for him since the moment he was born. Now holding him in her arms only seemed to intensify that feeling. She was holding her little fighter, the little boy who had been given a shitty card the moment he was born and had all odds against him making it out alive but here he was, in her arms none the less, alive, healthy and strong.

She couldn't believe how fast time seemed to pass. Looking down at Abel, she knew that if time seemed to move as quickly as it was, he would soon be going to school and running around causing trouble and breaking hearts.

* * *

Looking at Carrie holding his son seemed like a natural picture to Jax. He knew how much she loved Abel. He could tell just by the way her face would lit up every single time she saw him. Now seeing her holding him brought back those thoughts that had been plagued his mind since the moment he let her walk away.

He knew if he hadn't screwed everything up, Abel would have grown up with Carrie being around and being his mother figure. He couldn't help but let his mind wonder to what could have been.

He closed the distance between him and Carrie. He put his left hand on Abel's head, as he looked down at him.

" He's perfect Jax." Carrie whispered.

Those words had him picturing a scene where it was Carrie who was Abel's mother and her telling him those words as she held _their _son. He quickly got rid of those thoughts. She would never hold _their_ son, instead she would meet some guy, who wasn't him, to fall in love with, and she would get married and have kids but she would never have _his_ kid. A little piece of both of _them_.

He knew he had to stop thinking those types of thoughts because_ he _was the one to blame for everything. It was because he was an asshole and had slept with Tara, instead of just fixing her problem and leaving for his date with Carrie, that he was where he was now. Besides he was with Tara, so shouldn't she have been the one here instead of Carrie?

He knew he had to stick to his decision and stop thinking about her but he couldn't help it. Whenever he saw her thoughts of how things would have been rush into his mind. When he's with Tara, he thinks about what it would be like if it was Carrie.

He was seriously fucked in the head because he was with Tara but yet he had thoughts about someone else. He knew he had to stop because if he didn't he could get himself into a situation that he didn't want to fucking deal with. And in order to do that he knew he had to make sure he didn't see Carrie because seeing her would only fuck with his head. Knowing that he wanted her but couldn't have her because he knew it wasn't safe.

If things didn't work out she would not only break his heart but it would hurt his son as well. He knew that it was wrong to assume that and stay with Tara, the woman who had broken his heart before but she was safe. He knew her like the back of his hand, that's why he had chosen to stick with Tara.

He only hoped that it didn't come and bite him in the ass and regret the choice he was making once and for all.

* * *

Seeing the picture that was being painted in Abel's room Gemma knew that Carrie was the person that was supposed to be in her son and grandson's life. Too bad her son was blinded by the love he thought he had for the doctor bitch.

She knew that if Tara hadn't come back, Jax would have been with Carrie and the family scene they were displaying in the room would have been real.

Gemma smirked. " I guess it's never to late to make it happen."


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: I want to thank you guys for continuing to read and review. It means a lot to me. I want to especially thank Dark-Alana for being my go to person on this story. She has really helped me with the direction on where to take the story, so it's only fair that she gets the credit. So thank you Dark-Alana for helping me on this chapter and sharing ideas. As the saying goes "two minds are better than one", and that is definitely the case here. I hope you guys enjoy the story and continue to read and review because the drama that we all love in the SOA world is going to start at any moment. Like I always say if you have any question's you can always PM me and I will answer you as quick as I can.**

* * *

Chapter Thirteen

Work was going to be torture for Carrie. She had a feeling that she wouldn't be able to catch a break long enough to actually be able to rest and catch her breath. Looking at the nurses station and seeing the charts of patients that needed medical attention made her even more bitter about the fact that they were short handed on staff. She knew that it had to do with the fact that Charming was a small town and St. Thomas was the only hospital located in the town.

They mostly had calm days at the hospital. It was rare when the people of Charming seemed to have medical emergencies, that would keep the staff on high alert and on their feet all day but when that happened, it seemed like the whole town decided they needed to go to the hospital for one thing or another.

OK, so maybe she was exaggerating on the last part but it was enough to keep them wondering when they would be able to catch a break. Luckily, those days were rare and the days usually consisted of people getting medical care, while the staff would be able to get take a break without having to run around like chickens with their heads cut off.

Unfortunately, today wouldn't be one of those calm days. It seemed like today everyone needed medical attention. It seemed like they just kept getting more and more people as the seconds passed. Their were that had appointments to see their doctor, people in the ER who needed medical attention and then there were the patients that were admitted into the hospital that needed to be taken care of as well.

The thought that this was one of those moments when they could have used all the people they had working in the hospital and the fact that there were people who had taken their vacation early, didn't do anything to ease the minds of those who were actually working. In fact it seemed like every time the staff thought about how much rest and fun the others were having in their vacation, they seemed to get bitter and became less patient, only thinking about when they would be able to go home.

Could anyone blame them though? They were most likely going to have to do double shifts and probably skip any break they could have, in order to attend to everyone but that was expected when you worked at a hospital. You never knew what was in store for you when you walked through the hospital doors and started your shift.

* * *

Right now, Carrie just wanted to catch a break but she knew that it was impossible. So she did the next best thing. That was to stop complaining, pick up a chart and get to work.

As she read the the chart, she prayed that the patient would be easy to deal with, because after dealing with a patient who just didn't want to cooperate, she was running low on patience and she didn't want to lose her job because she was rude to a patient. Especially to a cop who had been stabbed trying to break up a bar fight.

As she made her towards the room, she took several deep breaths hoping to regain some of the patience that she had lost and only hoped that she would survive the day without having screaming matches with her patients or losing her job.

She knocked on the door before entering, just to make sure that she didn't see anything that she wasn't supposed to see.

As she walked in she noticed that the patient tried to sit up, but winced as he moved." It's alright. Don't worry about sitting up. I don't want you to rip your stitches Officer Smith."

" Please call me Calvin."

She gave him a small smile. " I'm just going to check your vitals and check your wound before changing the dressing."

When he nodded, she started to check his blood pressure and temperature. " Are you experiencing any pain or discomfort at the moment?"

" Just a little sharp pain from when I tried to sit up."

Carrie nodded. " OK. I'm just going to change the dressing and I'll go get something to ease the pain."

When Calvin nodded, Carrie started to check the wound to make sure he hadn't ripped his stitches and that the wound hadn't gotten infected.

She was cleaning the wound when she heard the door to the room open. She glanced to wards the door to see who had entered.

She noticed that it was the same officer that had been at T-M when she had gone to talk to Jax.

He greeted both of them before taking a seat on the chair on the other side of the bed. Carrie was trying to remember his name as she finished changing the dressing on the wound.

" I'll be back with something to ease the pain alright?"

Calvin nodded and she made her way towards the room and to get some some morphine.

As she was making her way back towards the room, she suddenly remembered the officer's name was David Hale and he was Deputy Chief of Charming PD.

She knocked on the door before entering. She walked towards the bed and administered the morphine through the IV that was in the officer's hand.

" You might get sleepy with the morphine but it'll ease the pain. If you need anything just press the button and someone will come in to check on you."

Calvin gave her a smile." Thanks nurse Blake."

" No problem and please call me Carrie."

He smiled and thanked her, before she excused her self and continued to do her rounds.

* * *

Half an hour later she was at the nurses station printing out some release papers.

She was startled when she heard, " Hey Carrie."

She looked up to see Officer Hale smiling at her.

She smiled back at him. " Hey Officer Hale. How are you?"

" Please call me David and I'm good what about you."

She smiled. " That's good to hear and I'm doing good just busy with work."

He nodded. " Do you have time to go get something to eat?"

Carrie was going to decline since they were so busy but before she had a chance one of the nurses and her friend Mackenzie said, " GO. This is probably going to be the only break you'll get. Besides I'll fill in for."

Carrie nodded. As she and David were walking she glanced back at her friend, who gave her a wink.

Carrie rolled her eyes knowing what Mackenzie was thinking. Sure David Hale was good looking and she wanted to move on but she just didn't think right now was a right time to date anybody. Either way it wasn't a date it was just two people going to get some lunch.

Once they were in the elevator David turned to her. " So where do you want to go?"

" Is it alright if we go to the cafeteria?"

David smiled. " That's fine. Cafeteria it is then."

When the elevator doors opened they made their way towards the cafeteria.

They had gotten their food and had just sat down when David looked at Carrie. " How do you Jackson Teller?"

Carrie looked up from the chicken salad she had gotten. " I met him when he went to visit Abel. I was checking Abel's vitals when he walked in."

David nodded before taking a bit of his sandwich. They were quiet while they continued to eat there food.

They were almost done eating when David broke the silence. " You need to be careful around them. They're not the type of people you want to be around. Especially when Jackson Teller is involved."

Carrie leaned closer. " Listen I know you're a cop and everything but that doesn't mean that you can tell me how to live my life. So I would appreciate it, if you wouldn't try to tell me what to do. Nothing is going on between me or any of them especially not with Ja- … Mr. Teller."

" I just don't want you to end up getting hurt because of them."

Carrie stood up. " I think I can make my own judgment calls. Have a good day Deputy Chief Hale."

Carrie walked away, only pausing to throw her trash away. She couldn't believe that when he finally broke the silence it was to tell her not to be around them. He didn't exactly come out and say it but she knew the message was there.

He didn't want her to get hurt because of them? Well it was a little to late for that she had already been hurt by Jax but that was in the past.

Carrie shook her head as she made her way towards Abel's room. Her already bad mood was slightly worsened after her conversation with David and she knew that the only way to relieve that mood was to visit her favorite patient.

She was caught up in her thoughts that she didn't notice the woman in the room with Abel right away.

When she did she abruptly stopped in the doorway. Carrie cleared her throat. " Excuse me miss. But only family members are allowed in her."

The woman turned around. " I'm his mother."

Carrie felt like a ton of bricks had just landed on her. Standing before her was the woman who was responsible for Abel being born so prematurely and addicted to crack.

" Well you're not on the list to see him and I don't blame his family for not putting you there. After all it is your fault he was born so early."

Carrie noticed Wendy flinch as the words came out of her mouth but she didn't seem to care. After all this was the woman who was at blame and she couldn't bring herself to pity her.

"Listen. I don't know what possessed you to get high while you were pregnant bu-"

Carrie didn't even finish when Wendy interrupted her. " Exactly you don't know. I tried quitting but I couldn't. You've never been addicted to drugs, so you don't know how hard it is to quit and you don't know what I've been through."

" Then why don't you tell me?"

Wendy shook her head. " It's a long story. You don't want to listen to what I have to say anyway."

Wendy looked towards Abel. " I just wanted to see him."

Carrie nodded. " Fair enough," Carrie looked at the clock. " Jax should be here soon. Why don't you wait for him and see if he'll let you hold him. After all he is your son."

Wendy smiled and gave Carrie a small smile. " Thanks for the advice, " she grabbed her bag. " I'm just going to wait outside."

Carrie nodded. " I should get back to my rounds."

They both walked out, before Carrie left she turned to Wendy. " If you ever need someone to talk to or you want to tell me you're life story. You know where to find me."

Wendy nodded. " Thanks for the advice Carrie."

Carrie was confused, when Wendy pointed at the hospital ID she realized that she read her name on it.

Carrie gave her a small smile before heading back to her rounds. As she walked away she mentally kicked herself. _Why would you tell her to find you if she needed someone to talk to? She's the reason Abel had to fight to live!_ Carrie shook her head, she couldn't take it back she just hoped that she wouldn't take her up on the offer.


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: I just wanted to let you know that the story roughly follows season one. Meaning that it's set during season one but it doesn't follow every single event and time line as the show and it won't be in the order it was on the show. I'm using the events in the order that fit what is going on in the chapters ( for now anyway). I just wanted to point that out because in season one when the fundraiser that Gemma hosts in the episode "Giving Back" ATF Agent Kohn is still alive but in this story he died early on, so that's something that doesn't follow the time line of the show but certain events may still be in the story but they're going to be in the way that fit what's going on in the chapters.**

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

A week had passed and Carrie was thankful that it was almost Thanksgiving because that meant that the staff that had taken their vacation would be back and they could all go back to their normal shifts.

Today was Tuesday and Carrie's day off and she was going to the Fundraiser that Gemma was hosting at the local school. There was a part of her that didn't want to go because_ he_ was going to be there but she had already agreed to go and meet up with Donna. Plus she had promised Ellie and Kenny that she would spend the day with them, since they had the week off for Thanksgiving break.

Carrie looked at the clock on the bedside table and sighed. She had to finish getting ready if she was going to meet up with Donna at noon like they had planned.

She had straightened hair and side swept bangs. She had some powder, eyeliner, mascara and lip gloss on.

She was wearing a dark blue shirt with the sleeves rolled up, black skinny jeans and black flats. She looked at the time and realized that she had to leave so she could get there on time.

She grabbed her keys, wallet, cellphone and bag before making her way out the door and towards her car.

She was five minutes late but that was because she couldn't find a parking spot. She quickly made her way towards the school where the fundraiser was being held and scanned the crowd looking for Donna and the kids.

She finally spotted them sitting on a bench but they weren't alone. She stopped walking when she saw Opie and Jax sitting beside them.

She was already late, so she took a deep breath before continuing to walk towards them. As she neared them she saw Opie and Jax stand up and leave. She exhaled and relaxed, knowing that she wouldn't have to face him just yet.

As soon as she was within eyesight she heard, " Carrie!" She stumbled as Kenny and Ellie hugged her.

" Hey guys sorry I'm late."

* * *

Jax and Opie were leaning against the side of the gym wall, where they still had a clear view of Donna and the kids, smoking a cigarette when they saw Carrie approach Donna with Ellie and Kenny by her side.

Out of the corner of his eye, Opie saw how Jax kept his eyesight on Carrie. Opie had suspicions that Jax had feelings for Carrie but was afraid of getting his heart broken so he decided to stay on the safe side and get back with Tara. Even though she had broken his heart, Jax knew Tara and he didn't know Carrie that well.

_Yeah because the dumb ass fucked up the chance to get to know her when he stood her up._ Opie thought and shook his head.

" She'd make a good old lady and a great mom some day." Opie glanced at his friend to see his reaction.

Jax exhaled. " Yeah she would."

" You have feelings for her man. Why don't you do something about it?"

Jax shook his head. " Nah man. I'm happy the way things are between me and Tara."

They both see Hale walk up to Carrie. Out of the corner of his eye Opie saw Jax clench his jaw before throwing his cigarette and stepping on it.

" You sure you don't have any feelings for her man? Because you're acting like a jealous boyfriend right now."

Opie decided to walk away before Jax could deny it because he knew no matter what excuse Jax said it was all lie.

* * *

Carrie and Donna were sitting down on the bench watching the kids play.

" I can't believe that _David Hale, _Deputy Chief of Charming PD came up to talk to you after what happened at the Hospital."

Carrie had spilled what had happened to Donna after David had left. Since she was a little bit mean to him when he was talking to her and Donna wanted to know what caused her to act that way towards him.

Carrie shrugged. " Yeah. Well if he thinks that he can just come up to me and act like he never told me what to do. Then he is crazy to think that I'm going to talk to him all polite and act like nothing happened."

Donna looked at Carrie. " Are you serious? You didn't even let him talk," Donna laughed. " Whenever he would try to say something you would either glare at him or completely interrupt him. Besides he didn't completely tell you what to do he just gave you a warning."

Carrie looked at Donna completely shocked. " You're taking his side now? Seriously?" Carrie shook her head. " I can't believe you. You're supposed to be on my side and agree with me, that it was completely unnecessary for him to give me a warning in the first place."

Donna laughed. " You're being a complete drama queen right now. Besides if it'll make you feel better he was acting like a douche for coming to talk to you without apologizing first."

Carrie nodded. " Yeah he was."

Donna shook her head and laughed.

" I leave for a little while and when I come back you two are acting like teenagers."

They looked behind them to see Opie with his eyebrow raised.

Donna and Carrie looked at each other before they started laughing.

Opie shook his head. He had to admit that this was the first time he had seen Donna interact with anyone and he was glad that Carrie had been able to get his wife to open up and have fun.

* * *

Two days had passed since the Fundraiser and it was finally Thanksgiving. Carrie would have been working today but had gotten the day off. More like traded the day and would have to work on the weekend. Either way she had gotten up early in an effort to go and help Donna prepare and cook Thanksgiving dinner.

Donna had decided against going to Gemma's for Thanksgiving and had decided to spend it at home since it was Opie's first holiday with the family since getting out of Chino. She had invited Carrie to her house, after Gemma had surprisingly invited Carrie to her home as well, even though she wasn't part of Gemma's "family".

Carrie didn't want to go spend the holiday with Jax and his family in what used to be his home, so she had offered to help Donna with making Thanksgiving dinner, after Donna had told her to spend it in their house instead of going to Gemma's.

So now she was awake in the early morning after getting a call from Donna telling her that she was waiting on her lazy ass to go and help her. She put on a pair of gray sweats, a gray sweatshirt and a pair of gray shoes.

She decided to skip putting on any make up and retied her hair up in a messy bun before grabbing her car keys and heading out the door.

As she made her way towards Donna's house the sun was barely rising. She shook her head._ Can't believe I'm up this early on my day off._

She pulled into the Winston's driveway, just as the sun was almost done rising. She made her way out of the car and towards the house.

She was surprised to see that the door had been left unlocked.

As she made her way inside she locked he door behind her. She heard the clanging of pots and pans coming from the kitchen and made her way towards where Donna was making a racket from.

" You're going to end up waking Opie and the kids with all the noise you're making."

She laughed as Donna jumped and whirled around clutching her chest.

" You freaking scared the shit out me."

Carrie only laughed and shrugged, " Well you did leave the front door unlocked."

Donna shook her head. " Well can you stop laughing and start helping me?"

A couple of hours later they had chopped and seasoned what they could cook later on so it would still be warm by the time the turkey was done.

Donna had thawed the turkey, so that was needed was for it to be seasoned and the oven needed to be preheated.

Carrie had barely turned the oven on when Opie and the kids came into the kitchen.

" What's for breakfast?"

Donna stopped getting the seasonings and turned around. " I don't know I've been busy getting everything ready so I could start cooking Thanksgiving dinner. Why don't you ask your father to go and get breakfast?"

Carrie saw that Opie wanted to protest but one look from Donna had him ushering the kids towards the door without a single word.

" Geez Donna. Who would have thought that the big bad biker would move so quickly to get breakfast."

Donna shook her head as she continued to get the seasonings. " That's what happens once you've been married as long as we have."

Carrie laughed. She was amazed at how much Opie and Donna loved each other. She only wished she could find something like what they had someday.

The turkey had barely gone into the oven when Opie and the kids returned with breakfast even though it should have been more like lunch given that it was almost noon.

They were currently sitting in the living room and eating the food, since the dinner table was full of different types of side dishes and deserts that needed to go into the oven or needed cooking.

" Are you going to Abel's homecoming party on Saturday Carrie?"

She looked at Ellie and shook her head. " I can't. I have to work that day."

" I thought he was going to be home today."

" He was but he got a small fever and had to be kept a little longer just to make sure everything was alright."

When they had finished eating they had cleaned up. Carrie and Donna got back to cooking while Opie played with the kids outside to keep them out of the way.

When dinner was ready they sat down and began to enjoy all the food that had been cooked.

They were laughing and cracking jokes with each other. The same thing was happening at Gemma's house.

They were all having a good time and enjoying each others company.

Not one of them ever suspected that maybe this was the only time they would be this happy. They're lives were about to be turned upside down and none of them had any idea of what was to come.

* * *

**Sorry it took me a while to update and I apologize if the chapter wasn't as good as what you were expecting. things will start to pick up soon though. Also on my profile I have where you can see the outfits worn in each chapter and I will put a link to what the characters you don't know in the story look like, so I will hopefully have that up soon. Anyways I hope you review and let me know what you think of the story so far and I hope you all have a great weekend.  
**


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